I was just chatting with a friend and she says to me….”Laura, you’re so confident. I wish I could do the things you do.” and I said to her….”You can!” and then shared with her some of my most favorite tips on how to gain Confidence.
Truth be told that I wasn’t always this way. It took a long time to feel comfortable in my own skin, to find my voice and to take action in creating my dream life.
You see, I WAS a victim of sexual abuse, verbal abuse and physical abuse growing up. I felt little and worthless most of my life. It was when Bob, my husband, said something to me that really made me think. It was then that I decided to be a VICTOR, not a victim.
I was in my twenties at the time. I don’t even remember now really what we were talking about but I do remember saying to him….”I want to be a somebody!” and he said….”You’re already somebody!” and that really got me thinking.
Little by little, my attitude about myself began to change. It wasn’t an overnight thing but it’s one that by the time my 30’s rolled around and that I lost my job to corporate downsizing, that I felt more confident about who I was and what I wanted in my life. I was even willing to take more risks to achieve those things too.
So, you’re probably wondering what tips I shared with my friend? Well, I’m happy to tell you those things right now.
1. Stop worrying what other people think of you. What matters more is what you think of yourself. An affirmation that I like to say to myself is….I am strong and confident. (If you like affirmations, be sure to check out my Pinterest boards where I have pinned a bunch of various ones.)
2. Focus on what you’re good at. Often times we spend our energy focusing on the things we aren’t good at. Let’s do the opposite. Jot down 5 things you’re good at and post it somewhere you’ll see each day.
3. Take action everyday. By this, I mean that being indecisive is not a good thing. Everyday you must take action on something if you want your life to be better. Making a decision is often times better than not making one at all.
4. Take care of yourself too. Often times we get so busy taking care of everyone else that we often out ourselves last. It’s time to make yourself a priority. Take out your calendar, call your day spa and book that massage that you’ve been dreaming about or whatever else it is that you’ve been putting off. Buy some new makeup, get a new hair do, buy a new outfit. Those things help build confidence too.
5. Watch the words you speak and those that you think. This one is really, really important. How many times have you said something like. “I’m stupid” or “That was dumb of me.” when you made a mistake? Even if jokingly, you said or thought those things. Let’s choose not to do that anymore. Would you talk like that to someone else? Would you tell them they are stupid or dumb? Start speaking and loving yourself the way you do other people.
6. Visualize who you want to be. Just like when we were kids, we imagined who we wanted to become. You can do the same as an adult. Each morning, take a few minutes to sit and think about a confident new you.
So there you have it. I’ve given you 6 tips to help boost your confidence. If I can do it, you can too. I’ll be here rooting you on.
For more inspiration, tips and tools that I use, be sure to join me in my closed facebook group: https://www.fb.com/groups/492161641172413 See you there!